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Coger la papa y el origen de la humanidad

Una Borrachera cósmica , de Mark Forsyth, desbroza la historia del alcohol y de su hija natural, la cogorza

He aquí un libro poliédrico. Podría decirse que es una aproximación histórica al origen de las bebidas alcohólicas. Sería una opinión academicista y estaría en sazón. También podría definirse como un libro que aborda, desde la erudición, el placer de libar. Y también sería correcto. Y, una más, cabría igualmente afirmar que el autor escribe sin tapujos sobre un tema tan mundano como es el hábito -o el arte, o el vicio– de emborracharse . Tres miradas que complementan perfectamente una opinión sobre Una borrachera cósmica (Ariel) de Mark Forsyth, escritor inglés especializado en la etimología de las palabras y que es reincidente: ya escribió Una breve historia de la borrachera, porque como todos sabemos hay borracheras breves y otras que hacen historia.

El libro está escrito con mucho sentido del humor, documentado y con un ritmo ágil. Se lee casi como se bebe, según el día. Es una buena aproximación a los datos, a la cultura de cada civilización en relación con el alcohol y contiene buenas dosis de entomología antropológica, porque, salvo casos irremisibles o para quienes el alcohol es el atajo por rancheras hacia el olvido, se bebe socialmente, para compartir, celebrar, para ponernos cariñosos, para festejar, para vivir. Aunque, ojo, el libro está lejos de ser un alegato a favor de cogerla a cuadritos. Es descriptivo e interpretativo, y destila -!ese verbo!- eso sí, una dulce invitación a comportarnos como seres humanos, como hemos hecho los bípedos desde el primer día de nuestra existencia:” Antes de ser humanos, fuimos bebedores. El alcohol existe naturalmente. Cuando comenzó la vida, hace 4.000 y pico de años, ya había microbios de una sola célula nadando felizmente en el caldo primordial, bebiendo azúcares simples y excretando etanol y dióxido de carbono. Básicamente estaban meando cerveza”, argumenta Forsyth. De hecho, la lectura invita a preguntarse qué hubiera sido de este mundo sin el alcohol. Y a la vista de su trabajo se puede afirmar que el nuestro sería un planeta bien distinto. “La borrachera es universal”, concluye. Embriagarse, emborracharse, coger la tajá, la merluza, la cogorza, el colocón, una papa gorda…da igual como se llame, es el ejercicio de beber como una pieza del engranaje de la evolución humana.

Los borrachos o el triunfo de Baco, 1629 Diego Velázquez

El libro te transporta a una taberna del oeste, a las cervecerías inglesas medievales, a la antigua Grecia, al Bagdad del siglo VIII o a la antigua Roma. Y nos descubre cómo los antiguos persas discutían sus decisiones políticas más relevantes dos veces. Una vez sobrios y otra borrachos. Si la conclusión de ambos cónclaves era la misma, la daban por buena. Visto el resultado de muchos comités ejecutivos actuales,  perfectamente cerebrales, trilingües y con gran profusión de powerpoints, igual hay que plantearse si el procedimiento persa es más eficaz.

Los griegos no bebían cerveza, bebían vino. Los egipcios, sí. Y por lo visto, a las egipcias les gustaba tela privar. Odín, el macho-alfa de la mitología nórdica, lo que viene siendo un vikingo de toda la vida, solo bebía vino. Pero no comía nada. Ni una gilda. Los chinos hicieron vino por primera vez en el 2070 a.c. Confucio le pegaba fuerte al vaso, pero como Sócrates, nunca se emborrachaba. Parece ser que los romanos fueron los primeros en dar la barrila con el tipo de uva y las añadas y, aunque con finura y exquisitez cultivada, se la pegaban fuerte en el convivium, que era una especie de sobremesa con barra libre y Paquito el chocolatero a tope y donde, a diferencia del symposum griego, también podían asistir las mujeres. A este verbena acudía cada uno con su esclavo -copero- para que le sirviera en exclusiva. Iván el terrible nacionalizó todas las tabernas rusas y a la vez le sobró tiempo para masacrar a los habitantes de Kazán y ordenar la construcción de la catedral de San Basilio. Un prócer. Los aztecas se entregan al pulque, un brebaje macerado con savia de magüey. Guillermo III de Holanda -!oh, sorpresa!- fue quien introdujo el gin en Inglaterra, que causaba furor por cuatro razones, dice el autor: la monarquía, los soldados, la religión y el fin de la hambruna. Stalin emborrachaba a su Politburó cada noche, los dejaba mamados de vodka hasta evitar cualquier posibilidad de conspiración o similar. O, por último, anotemos que la Ley seca era una ley feminista que pretendía sacar a los hombres de los bares. El libro tiene mucha miga, incluyendo la magnífica reflexión anatómica de Benjamín Franklin sobre la función bisagra del codo humano.

Una borrachera cósmica no es un libro de anécdotas, aunque pudiera parecerlo. Como queda dicho contiene sustratos de historia, cultura y antropología humana y, sobre todo, explica una buena parte de lo que somos.

473 Comentarios

  1. Quien me conoce sabe que a mi no me gustaba el vino, solo bebía cerveza, pero un amigo mío, bien sabes quién es, me introdujo en el mundo de los vinos.
    Me encanta beber en compañía, en reunión e familiares, con amigos , todavía no en solitario.
    En alguna ocasión he cogido una papa pero al estar rodeada con amigos o familiares la papa fue menos papa
    Gracias por tu arte.
    Que bien lo cuentas todo.

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