Platos para hartarse de reír
La idea de la gastronomía “divertida” se cuela entre nosotros sin que nadie defina exactamente por qué un plato es divertido, pero todos la glosan y apelan a ella
adie diría que unas migas extremeñas, un cocido madrileño, unas papas a la riojana o un cordero al horno son platos divertidos. Al contrario, se diría que son adustos, serios, contundentes, profundos y resolutivos. Póngale los calificativos que quiera. Pero divertidos, jamás. No forman parte del recetario divertido. ¿Pero cuándo empezaron a calificarse de divertidos algunos platos de nuestra cocina o por extensión algunas propuestas gastronómicas completas? Ni idea, del tiempo de nuestras reivindicadas abuelas no viene. Debió ser con la llegada de la cocina rabiosamente moderna de El Bulli y el terremoto que ocasionó en los fogones nacionales. Se diría que fue una consecuencia de haber coronado la modernidad gastro. De pronto, en boca de los críticos gastronómicos, tan creativos como los comentaristas deportivos en el uso de la alegoría y la hipérbole, hubo bocados y cocinas que empezaron a ser considerados divertidos, lo cual no deja de ser una prosopopeya al atribuirle cualidades animadas a seres inanimados.
Las recetas dejaron de ser sabrosas, deliciosas, arrebatadoras, gozosas, sorprendentes si se quiere, y se convirtieron en divertidas, esa característica inaprensible e indefinida. Hasta ese momento, divertida era cualquier pieza de Les luthier, un episodio de Astérix con Goscinny en vida o La vida de Brian de cabo a rabo. ¿Pero un plato puede ser divertido? ¿por qué? ¿qué define su divertimento? ¿qué atributo necesita una receta pasar entrar en la categoría de divertido? ¿colores, texturas, esos nombres atrevidos entre el paraíso onírico de García Márquez y el colorido animoso e irreductible del Mago de hoz? ¿quizás hace reír el plato? ¿Porque la experiencia al consumirlo te sorprende y te divierte?
El concepto de cocina divertida aplicada a la elaboración de platos para niños, en los que las formas simulan muñecos y los colores hacen más atractiva la ingesta, tiene cierto sentido; pero trasladada la idea a la gastronomía con ínfulas de vanguardia y modernidad no tiene explicaciones convincentes. Y confunde a las gentes de buen corazón. Porque de esos lodos llega un tipo a Master Chef y cocina una cosa que llama León come gambas y pone a España a partirse de risa y no precisamente por la calidad conceptual del divertimento gastronómico de su obra magna.
Doctores tiene la iglesia, pero buscando y buscando no se hallan respuestas ni explicaciones convincentes. La idea de una gastronomía divertida se ha colado hasta la cocina, nunca mejor traída la expresión, y ha condicionado además a algunos cocineros y empresarios del sector, que se están empeñando en hacer cocina divertida porque se supone que es negocio, es cool y mola aunque no sepamos qué la define. De hecho, los restaurantes de “cocina divertida” amenazan con ser una epidemia. Tantas veces el lenguaje predetermina la realidad que la gastronomía no iba a quedarse al margen.
Se entiende que la crítica gastronómica se ha alimentado siempre de precisiones -temperaturas, rigores académicos, ingredientes canónicos, procedimientos y técnicas acreditadas- y que, autorevolucionándose al tiempo que lo hacían los fogones ha empezado a hollar el territorio de las metáforas y las nebulosas literarias, entre ellas la que más divierte a quien suscribe es la de la cocina divertida, que aún no sé bien qué es.
Con la fuerza de la influencia algún amigo propone de vez en cuando ir a cenar a un restaurante divertido, que por lo visto es condición preferente a la de ir a un restaurante a comer bien. Antes para divertirse uno se iba a la discoteca, al cine, al teatro o a bailar. Ahora se puede ir a un restaurante porque hay cocineros que prometen el paraíso gastronómico bajo el ropaje del divertimento en el plato. Curiosamente, para muchos lo divertido no se asimila a lo frívolo. No. Lo divertido es un estadio más de evolución de la cocina española. Sin definiciones exactas ni consensos profesionales ni academia que lo ampare, lo divertido forma parte ya de la cocina española. Es como una sección paralela: cocina divertida. No ha mucho ibas a un restaurante a divertirte comiendo, ahora la cualidad reside en el plato no en la acción: ya no es consecuencia, sino pretensión. Ya no te diviertes porque la comida ha sido mítica sino porque los platos, en su mismidad, eran divertidos.
Pero, insisto, ¿qué cosa es? ¿me van a clavar en un restaurante de cocina divertida pero me voy a divertir? ¿me voy a reír pero voy a comer mal? “Una cocina divertida con detalles geométricos”, escribe una experta respecto a un restaurante en Madrid. “Siete ideas de Cocina divertida para los más pequeños” anuncian y reclaman unos grandes almacenes, que en realidad anuncian unos sandwiches de los de toda la vida en unos platos llamativos y, al parecer, divertidos. “Carpaccio de melón, mojama y berberechos, una receta tan divertida como ligera” dice un titular en un portal especializado. Por supuesto en el ancho mundo del divertimento también hay embutidos, conservas, cervezas, vinos, panes, dulces y tartas divertidas o ensaladas desternillantes. Preguntas sin respuestas que deja este comienzo de 2023. Diviértanse, que son dos días.
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La categoría de divertido ha inundado todo, no solo la gastronomía.. Es hija de la confusión, del descriterio, de la necesidad de novedades y de la pobreza de léxico. Aplíquese a todo lo vano y “distinto”, aunque no valga nada.
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